Channel 4 Unveil new Benefits Street style show.


CHANNEL4-FUCKED-UPChannel 4, Paul Dacre’s new favourite TV station is to follow up “Benefits Street” with a new “documentary” entitled “Floodplain Families.”

It follows the lives of residents in the Somerset Plains area, as they stoically face up to the aftermath of the now bi-annual floods. So far, early screenings have indicated that public sympathy is very much with the government and not the residents. “I hope they drown, I’m sick of them whining about dredging and flood defences, do fuck off! Maybe try contributing to GDP a bit more eh? “ tweeted a clearly incensed Toby Young.  Whilst financial advisor Judd Hemple echoed these sentiments adding“I do hope these mewling media whores aren’t using this ‘flooding’ nonsense as an excuse to stay off work’

One twitter user known as Fascist_ Bill_III said ‘it’s a lifestyle choice to live in a floodplain area so why should we bail them out?” Adding, “They’re all cunts and I hope Davey Jones drags them to a hellish watery grave.” …. ” Oh, and Sharks feast on their lazy fat spotty arses”

Stock Broker Anton Choke said “I don’t see why my taxes should be used to support their indolent lifestyle, besides they seem to be having a great time splashing about in the water. Maybe they should have planned ahead and built an Arc or something. After all Noah didn’t wait around for the council to help him out whining ‘Oooh those clouds look ominous’, he got off his backside and utilised his carpentry skills. “

One twitter user knows with the frankly incongruous user name – David_Cameon did show some empathy and revealed that he once had water damage and said ‘a bit of wallpaper came down’ and there were ‘drips in a bucket’ (plenty of them in We(s)tminister)

Channel 4 confirmed they were looking for families in the area who were illegal immigrants, on benefits, gay and who had a chronic substance problem but denied this was in any way exploitative. “It’s a sensitive real life drama with real people – imagine “Water World” on crystal meth,” said producer Fin Marsh.